Wards Ap Biology Lab 5

Title: Hello, you fool, I love you
Fandom: JE fandom [Arashi / KAT-TUN, mentions of Mostar Other groups]
Pairing: Kamenashi Kazuya / Ueda Tatsuya
Wordcount: 11.700
Summary: Down-on-his-luck paparazzo Knew It Was Tatsuya Ueda trouble the second I stepped Into That damned set. In a Desperate Attempt to Save His tabloid from going under, I goes undercover at the set of the craziest movie of the century and Finds More Than What He Had bargained for.
Notes: This fic has to download soundtrack You Can! You're supposed to listen to it while reading. Each "**" indicates That You Should Go to the next song. Written for CHT
MLXC sono_kiseki JE_Hols for the fic exchange. Thanks to my betas:
mrsatterthwaite and ungalad . You were amazing! AMAZING. Part 1




***
I met with my informant - Yokoyama, of K8 FX - in a shady bar in an events Shadie part of town. The whole place smelled of urine, vomit and cheap vodka and so did MOST of ITS customers. Yokoyama

WAS standing in front a pinball machine totally captivated by it.

'Hey. "

'Hey. "

'I need you to repay That Favour. "

He glares at me.

'For the ninth time, lending me a camera eleven not does mean I owe you all the help You Need, asshole. "

'It's just a question. "

I Went back to historical pinball game.

'As long as it's the right kind of question ...'

That Was all I needed.

'What do you know about Miyake Ken? "

He glares at me again.

'Puede Google That. "

'Oh, But Google Does Not come with a winning smile. "

'Seriously, google it. The guy is famous. "

'Yes, I know all about historical fame But I want inside info. "

I stopped playing and stared at me for a long time.

'Best stuntman ever. Masaki Aiba Taught Everything it knows. Retiring Later this year. "

'Oh, why is that? "

'I got bored. Plus he's broken Every Bone In His body. Even the ones in His ears. "

'Figures. But Does He Have the money? "

'Apparently. I have friends in high places. "

Jackpot!

'Or do the friends in high places Have Him? "

'I Doubt it, he's a real righteous dude. "

righteous So I tries to kill people for fun and profit.

'Are you sure about that? "

'Yes, absolutely. " Yokoyama

Was a great judge of character, so I Was Starting To Have mand Doubts.

'Does not sick I Have A Sister? A granny I loves very much? "

'Nope. Have I does around six girlfriends, though. "

I sighed.

'You do not know anything else? "

'Like what? "

Like whether or not I Was a murderous psychopath, for example.

'Like Those Who Are friends in high places, for example. "

Then I Fell silent and spoke slowly.

'All I can tell is one word. V6. "

'You're not making sense and Stock. "

'That's all I can say. "

I Was sure we where dealing with people Dangerous, But When They scare the guy That Creates New Methods of setting people on fire, you know you're fucked. CHTM
LXC I Thought About It And Then Settled on getting as drunk as humanly possible it WAS. It Changes your perspective or at least
shakes it up a little bit. Literally. Almost

I succeeded and when i got out of the daze, it WAS WAS 7 a.m. and breaking morning. I Decided That WAS Yokoyama
drunk enough to forget all Survival Instincts - so was I - so I Repeat the question.

'Come on, tell me. Who are these guys V6? "

'OK, I will but Do not Tell Them I Told you. They're a super secret league of men That JE control the studio. "

'That's ... not Surprising. Either And not a secret. "

'Yes, But Nobody Knows Who They Are. "

'Let me guess. Miyake, Sakamoto, Nagano and Okada, Are not They?'

' You're too smart for your own good. "

'No, the JE is too transparent. Except from Miyake, The Other Two Are Executives That Have tons of power. And Sakamoto is a board member. I do not know why it is secret. "

'They're six, you idiot. "

'So? The other board members? "

'I can not talk. Beside, you're meeting soon Them. "

'What? You sold me out?

Again? " 'Sorry. I love my job. Where else do I get to blow up stuff and get paid for it? "

I tried to run away, But Several times tripped. The streets Were Starting to get full of people and everybody Looked suspicious. These guys psychos May Not Have Been, But They Were, at least, negligent regarding thand health of Their actors. And directors. And Shinto Priests.

I Was Being Followed and I Knew it. A car stopped right in front of me and Some brawny guy Threw Me Into the trunk. The car sped-through Tokyo in a mad chase Towards Nowhere WAS and all I hoped to get out of it alive.

We stopped and Before They blindfolded me Taking me out. It surprised me, Since I Was too drunk to remember events Where I Had Been the night before. We

walk - well, They Walk and I staggered - until i heard a door open and I Was unceremoniously Seated in a cold, metallic chair.

They removed the blindfold and I saw an empty Almost office. It Was dim and I Could Hear Another person mutter and Struggle to my right. To my great

Surprise, it WAS

Taguchi. My first impulse WAS to ask What the hell WAS I doing there, But I Still Had a bit of common sense left.

'Welcome,' Said a velvety voice. 'We hope you're enjoying yourself. " I glanced

around and saw a shadowy figure sitting in Another chair.

'Yeah, you've got a really high end establishment here. " Went There

my last bit of common sense.

'Your sarcasm is not good here. What do you know about Operation Darling? "

'Nothing at all, sir. "

The voice laughed. It Was chilling.

'We broke Into your apartment. We Have Seen the files. "

'Oh. Did you find the actor too? I WAS planning on Returninghim, I swear. "

'No, I Had to go film a movie. The one we finance. "

'Oh. You're Sakamoto. "

He Did not look as Imposing as Had I imagined him to be.

'You're smart. "

'Do I get an Explanation Before Being dropped Into Tokyo Bay? "

'Maybe. Do you promise to shut up? " It Was Obvious

We Both Knew the answer.

"Nope."

'Figures. Can we strike a deal? "

A deal? Why a deal?

'If your offer is good enough. "

bluffer I Had My Way Through Life and I Was an expert at it.

'So, in exchange of your life, you get to expose a dark, dark plot to murder two up and coming actors. "

'And What do I get to hide? "

'Our Involvement in it. "

'Can I Ask You Something? Is this a publicity stunt? "

'No.'
'So it has Something to insurance with cops? "

'No, you can not ask anything. "

'You're no fun at all. I want my explanation. It's the Way Things Are Done. "

'You're not the hero, But I like your style. I'll tell you. It's just a retirement present. "

'Are you fucking kidding me? "

'No. Ken wanted to do Something memorable. What's Better Than a murder plot? "

'A dead actor? "

'There Are More WHERE Came From That One. "

'I wanted Yamashita dead, Did I? "

'It Would Have BeenA Welcome side-effect. "

My Eyes Were Getting Used to the dimness and I Could see two Other Guys. They Were All the Same kind of wearing well-tailored suit That looks expensive, smells like money and Brings all the gold-diggers to the yard.

'Do You Have a Conscience? Any of you? "

'I'm a lawyer,' Said one of Them.

'And I'm an executive producer. " Sakamoto

Just Smiled in Such a way made it very clear historical answer.

'Good point. A soul? "

'I Used to work in the idol business,' He Said and Shrugged.

'Oh. Have you at least a brain. "

'Sadly, I Also Lack to heart. It was nice meeting you, But The fishes Await you. " Okada

Gave to dumb-looking thug and the thug look one Nodder. They left and only the thug remain.

'Tanaka?! " I Heard Taguchi scream.

'Taguchi! This is so weird! What are you doing here? "

'I'm Being Kidnapped. " Tanaka

got a little bit closer. I Could see all historical tattoos. It Was a sight I did not need.

Taguchi and I Engaged in the kind of conversation you Have at class reunions. It Was out of place and out of a surreal movie. Luis Buñuel
Would Have Been Proud.

'Oh, that's too bad. "

'Come on, let us go. We're buddies! "

'Oh, no. These guys are Dangerous. They'll find out I help you and kill me. "

'I can punch you out. I'm half-way untied, anyway,so that'll Be The end result. Let's save ourselves the trouble. "

I sounder smart. It scared me.

'You were always good at ropes. "

Tanaka - who ever the hell I was - Taguchi untied first, Who Then unceremoniously knocked him out. I Was Then untied
too and left to wonder at the marvels Many That the world offered.

Complicated As we Traversed the hallways of JE - I Recognized the place now - I Could Contain my curiosity.

'Who the fuck WAS that? "

'I met him at the chess club, back in high school. "

Suddenly, everyone Thought I Was an idiot. I Was Starting to think That as well.

'Yeah, right. The truth now. "

'I have pictures. " CHTM
LXC 'Right. "

'Pictures. "

'I Said right. That Means I buy it. Barely, But I Do. "

I Could Say The Same about my life as a whole. ***




When I got home, I not was surprised to see Kamenashi's stuff neatly packed Beside the door and him sitting in my couch with a cup of coffee in hand.
'I'm going away. The studio Call and Explained the situation to me. "

I hanged my jacket and sat además him. I did not want to look at him in the face.

"Figures."

'Look, thanks But this is impossible. We're enemies by nature. I'm an actor. You're a photographer. I can not trust you, do you
understand? Además,low rank samurai and I'm a vampire
But That Refuse to kill is always Forced to do so. "

It Was the best thing on the face on Earth. I hoped the movie Was a success if only to see a sequel.

'That sounds original. "

'The Combined Powers of Ninomiya and Matsumoto. But I digress. So they're Separating and she ASKs That. "

'What does the wise vampire say? "

'Nothing. He Was Never There to begin with. It Was all in her mind. "

'Are you telling me you're a hallucination? Because Being Crazy Would Explain A Lot, Actually. "

'No, I'm telling you this whole situation is as preposterous as Trying to kill Akanishi WAS. We Were in the middle of an
Elaborate prank. We Fellfor it and ... Just treat it as a dream. "

'A nightmare, you mean. Events and I did not get laid. "

I softly punched me in the shoulder.

'And You Did not get an exposé events! "

'What?! Tell your bosses I'll do whatever I want. "

'No, you won't. You CAN print a phoney story on the murder plot. Just say you never found out who did it. " My

Looked bleak future. So did my present.

'Nakamaru will kill me. And refuse to refund me the Expenses. "

'Then Be smarter next time. "

'Next time? "

'Yeah, Actually or do you think this is the last time you'll Have trouble with the studio? "

'See? You're confusing me now. Were not you aNo imaginary vampire and this wasn't all a dream? "

'That's the movie, although it wasn't all a dream. " That movie

Kept Getting Better and better.

'Then this is real life and if this is real life, we do not get second chances. " Real life

Kept getting worse.

'You really think that? "

'I do. I'm a photographer, you're an actor and this is the end of

Roman Holiday. "

'Of what? We're not in Rome. "

'Of You Should see a movie. You know, You Could Be the next Audrey Hepburn. All it'll take is to dial down the bitchiness. " Had I

Philosophical hit a state of mind or at least I Had stopped caring about everything. I Focus on a gray point of my gray wall Said
and nothing more.

I jump off the couch.

'Look, I'm going. May We Meet Again. May we not. I just wanted to say thanks and goodbye. "

'Do I get a kiss events? "

'No. They're addictive. "

I smile.

'Ok then. Goodbye. "

I left. I did not move away from the couch. It Was Had Passed as a toothache and a dull relief in WAS setting. WAS
Tomorrow another day and if I felt events as a mermaid sailor Who has let to pass by, I did not care.
I Was Alive WAS and normal life again. Colours May Be Pretty, But When They're clashing They make your head hurt and Those weeks Been Had enough adventure.
Life Went on as lifand is wont to do. Almost Nakamaru

fired and when to me I WAS ready to close down the magazine, Taguchi Offered him the exposé of the century - to 7-parts article about JE's general tax fraud and embezzling. I Avoided Mentioning Any prank and I and Tanaka Koki - I Knew They Did not Know Each Other from chess club - Went on to bigger and Paid Better Things. Had I played us like a fiddle and I did not Even Care.

Apparently, His whole 'Investigative journalist' was not a lie. His Real Name Was "Taguchi Junnosuke '- not Taro, as I Had Told us - and at first, I vaguely Recognized the name. Then, one night, as I Was watching the news, I Remembered. Had I Uncovered a politician's Relationship with the yakuza and subsequently Had vanished from the face of the EarthYake retired, happy and content. My mom Bought herself a karaoke machine. A technician Proposed to Toda Erika. She accepted. Ninomiya tiptoed out of the closet And Then Went Back Into it. His boyfriend - Since Kamenashi Was Right - show up in a magazine A Few days later, chicks and drug Surrounded by Rumours. Matsumoto managed to Not Have A psychotic episode. Yokoyama lost a testicle in a weird explosive accident. Masaki Aiba Decided to Become the Next Best Stuntman in Town. The store around the corner WAS closed. WAS Kamenashi's apartment building rebuilt. Yamashita created His own fragrance, 'Pink Seduction. " Followed Akanishi with 'Red Passion'. They Were Successful Parents of teenaged girls and yet lost a little more of hope for the future. Tanaka Koki, Taguchi's former companion ofr in my wallet.

Once, I met Akanishi. I Paid for the drinks and I ended up carrying capability him home. Yamashita Took care of him all night.

'You Knew it all along, Did not You? " Did Yamashita

look at me when I Answered:

"Maybe."

I revaluated my opinion of them to be just a teensy bit. Idiots They Might Have Been, But They Were loveable idiots and maybe
Had Some hidden depths.

Sometimes I Went out and caught a glimpse of a guy waifish Surrounded by bodyguards. I never Gave me a second glance.


One night, I Was Among the wannabes, the has-beens and the will-always-be, soaked in vodka. I lay in a chair and bobbed my heart to the
music, with my eyes shut. TheKept going and the lights Kept spinning world. Heard someone

I snort and I flipped off Them.

'Watch your manners. "

I did not Recognize the voice. I Recognized the sneer.

'Star Boy. "

'Paper boy,' I Answered and Sat Down Beside Me.

I Took Care Not to touch me.

'What are you doing here? " 'infamously Not getting drunk. " I laughed.

'You're so boring. "

'We've Already ESTABLISHED That. "

'Why are you talking to me? "

'Because you're Covered in your own vomit. "

'So what? It's my life and my prerogative. "

'One of my bodyguards is going to Give Youa ride home. "

I open my eyes.

'Do I get a good night kiss? "

'No. You get a shower. "

'You're no fun at all. " Laugh and

I Went Away.

'm still not sure it WAS real.


It Was a turning point, real or not. When you start to imagine encounters with divas That act as Fairy Godmothers, It Means There's Something wrong with you or at least with your life. Nearly Spring WAS

over and as much as I loved my new job of stalking teen starlets, WAS Something missing. The call to adventure WAS
strong and irresistible. There are so Many unsolved Murders - or so I Thought - So Many suspicious and secretive Producers
Contracts in this part ofThat town untouched WAS Leaving Them Almost a crime. Beside

, Who Would not Want a Life That Could Be Summed up as
'He's an Investigative Reporter haunted by dark historical past. He's a janitor that's more Than meets the eye. Together, They fight crime! "
?

Taguchi's business card burnt my wallet.


When we met again, I WAS as enthusiastic as ever, if historical events of an strident WAS hair shade of blond now. He events Gave me a new camera and a codename.

I Thought It Was silly at first. When, in the span of one week, We Were Chased by wolves, stalked by Russian mobsters, trapped in sinking boats and pushed of two buildings, I Decided That I Was Just Cautious.
I changed apartments. I sold MOST of my cinematicto books. I Did not Have a Need For Them anymore. Why Should I want to make movies when my life Was a movie in full Technicolor?

WAS Only one thing missing and I Knew I Could get it. All I need to do WAS to work on my timing. Last week


Already an Several weeks of filming late. Depressed actors, extras excited, stress Producers, directors and calm all of
cinema's interesting fauna.

And in the middle, a man with hips That Could with Rockefeller out of historical fortune and the eyes of a demon selling you insurance. The studio WAS chaos, again, But I wasn't aware. The September

pulsed with animation and hidden tension, with concealed Excitement and joy. I Just Walk Amidst the loud talk and entre a heated argumentBetween Matsumoto and Ninomiya. Masaki Aiba WAS playing with matches and switches. WAS A woman laughing and showing off a brand new ring Surrounded by make up artists. Two stars Were Having a beer and looking dejected in a corner.

And I Just Walk. I Did not Give a damn about the future. I Did not Give a damn about the past. I just wanted What I Was looking for. Maybe it WAS ridiculous and made no sense. Maybe We Did not match. Maybe that's why we liked Each Other. Maybe We Were a pair made in Heaven.

So I stepped up to the plate and Grabbed His wrist.

"Hi."

"Hi."

'I want my kiss. "

'Take it. "

I Embraced him and kissed him in Such a way Clark Gable Would Have Been Proud. CHT
MLXC At That Same exact instant, Matsumoto HAD DECIDED I HAD DECIDED That enough and the 'Wrap up! " Would look great in cake Ninomiya's face. And as we kissed, the battle roared and the world keep spinning, spinning out of historical axis as it always does. Chaos ensues in Each corner of Earth. Somewhere, Yokoyama Something blew up. Planned Sakamoto Another awesome prank. Some Okada drew up contract that'd tie a poor sucker to the studio forever. Lemmings Jump Out cliffs. Taguchi found a new interesting topic and tried to call me. Nakamaru a bathtub filled with money. Tanaka played chess with one of Kamenashi's bodyguards. A Shinto priest played with murderous historical dog. A Scorned Opened opera singer her third bottle of champagne.

And I? I did not care. I Had all I wanted and even more.

I Took His Hand and led him out. WAS My battered old car waiting for us. I Smile at him.

'Just for today,' He Said and I Shrugged.

'Are you sure? "
I laughed. I Laughed too.
Life Was An endless highway and I Had the convertible and the Love Interest.

Nothing Could stop us now.